Day 15, 16, 17

Day 15 and 16 are kind of a blur. I got little sleep. I prepped. I thought I had a cold which is actually allergies. I had little time to do much of anything than take care of a sick baby, prepare my food, and and eat it. 

So here I am on day 17 feeling great due to some much needed Claritin and Derek taking a til midnight shift with Lil and I going to bed somewhere between 8 and 9. he probably isn't fond of this scenario, but it seems fair to me. Six solid hours for him and 3-4 solid hours with a few hours collectivley sprinkled in the second half of the night. I went for a trip to the mall on my break to return two shirts that I will never where. I felt good. I felt incredible actually. Loads of confidence. Walking tall. I think people could feel it. I got looks. From men and women. I smiled. I bought a size large shirt. Not XL. LARGE. Yea. And it fits beautifully. I am starting to see who I could be. The healthy version of myself emerging. I am wearing a belt again on my pants because they don't stay up on their own anymore and when I sit down it doesn't hurt. The belt doesn't press into my guts making them hurt. This is amazing. This non-bloated alive version of me is AMAZING and I still have almost two more full weeks of this. I hope this feeling lasts. I hope it lasts longer. I am ready to shift my eating for a lifetime. I am ready. 

Switching gears, Lil is 9 months old today. Where did the time go? She does this adorable nose scrunch and breaths in and out really quickly while smiling and it cracks me up. She talks in tongue. La-laing it against her teeth make songs. She is feisty and hates getting dressed and diaper changes. She prefers the nude. She opens and closes doors. She is mesmerized by traffic and other moving things. She smiles at strangers when their own lips turn at the corners and if someone gets too close she buries her face in the crook of my neck still giving a cheeky grin.  She still cuddles with me and cries out in the middle of the night to make sure I'm there. I scoop her up and hold her close and we both sleep until the next time she wakes. She has been here on this earth for about the same amount of time as she was growing inside me. She is amazing. She is only 9 months old. 

Day 14

Being sick while on a Whole30 sucks. Being a sick Mama who has a sick babe while being on Whole30 is miserable.

Lil's sleep last night was a joke. Of course she will only eventually settle down with me. Not Derek. Ever. I know. This is on me. We've made her accustom to this arrangement and I am a believer in the path of least resistance, but when she is waking several times a night, I cry. I can't help it. Last night I got angry because all I wanted to do was eat my dinner and go to sleep. Yeah. That doesn't happen with a sick babe in the house. She can't get comfortable and tosses and turns then rubs her face till her paci falls out and the whole things just sucks.


Other craptastic day. Don't feel like going in to details.

Food:

Breakfast: Surprisingly really good. Two fried eggs with leftover chicken curry. Side of cucumber and red onion salad. So good I even took a picture of it....

Lunch: Zoodles with pesto and a small bowl of meat sauce

Dinner: Shredded BBQ chicken thighs over half a sweet potato and broccolii

Day 13

Day 13 should be labeled, No Filter because I do not have one today. Not that I'm being rude about how I say things, I'm just being stern and getting my point across when I otherwise would think a little more before I spoke to make sure I didn't offend other parties. Today, not the case. I've apologized a few times to my coworker about my snarky comments. Thankfully he understands.

Exhausted today. Feel crappy. What I was hoping was allergies I'm pretty sure is a cold. It sucks. The pressure sucks. The feeling that I'm going to sneeze every five minutes and then don't, sucks. The post-nasal drip sucks. The dripping out my nose at random times throughout the day sucks. It kind of all sucks and all I want to do is go home and curl up on the couch and nap. But that won't happen because I have to make effing curry because I'm doing an effing WHOLE30 and I need to make every damn thing I put into my body. Yeah. So Day 13 should also be labeled, this sucks, eff all the things!

Food:

Breakfast: Leftover sausage with onions and peppers

Lunch: Small bit of sweet potato hash, an egg, some shredded chicken with a big ass bowl of stir fry veg from Whole Foods.

Dinner: Chicken curry over cauliflower rice. Making this while feeling miserable and caring for a miserable babe left me tired and hungry quickly as well as crying while cooking.

The evening all around sucked.

Eff it.

Day 12

We managed to get a couple good chunks of sleep last night, but the sweet girl was miserable this morning. All we can do is wait it out.

I on the other hand feel pretty good minus the post-nasal drip and need to sneeze every hour or so. Hoping its just allergies. We have a lot to do this weekend and most of it is socializing... I took a probiotic and will take some vitamin C when I get home. I wonder if bee pollen is Whole30 compliant?

Whole30 has definitely lost its sparkle. Yes, I still feel good. But I'm tired of cooking every night. Thankfully Derek made the zoodles while he was home with the babe yesterday. I'm looking for dishes that are simple and easy. I would feel differently if I was okay with eating the same thing every night, but I'm not, and I can't. I need variety. I'm done with breakfast being breakfast too. In the Whole30 forum one of the gals gave us a quasi recipe for her butternut squash soup and it sounds divine. I think I'll whip that up this weekend and have that as part of a breakfast plate.

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Thought chain reaction: Talking to a coworker about zoodles ---> remeberring a nick name for a guy in my high school french class (zoobles) -------> because he looked like the fox on a childhood show---->   ZOOBILEE ZOO!

I don't know why I get so excited when I remember things I had previously forgotten from my childhood. The pink lady in the bottom right corner (Whazzat Kangaroo) I thought was secretly played by my mother. They look so similar. And no joke about the guy from french class. He looked just like the fox. 

Just like him.

Food:

Breakfast:  1 1/2 hard-boiled eggs... one half fell on the floor and sweet potato hash with ground turkey

Lunch: Leftover zoodles with meat sauce

Snack: apple with sunbutter and a small handful of coconut flakes and toasted almonds. I was a little hungry, but could've forgone this. But I am feeling a little woe is me today.

Dinner: applegate sausage with peppers and onions with a side salad. Ate more than I think I should have of the sausage, but I wasn't full.

I couldn't get full tonight. Rather than try to get full I am ending the evening with a box of kleenex and chai tea.

Day 11

My poor sweet Little Lady. Had a chunk of two hours worth of sleep and then around 8:15 pm started waking. She'd fall asleep in my arms and then immediately wake if I set her down. She only cried out once when she startled herself awake. I imagine she was having that falling feeling. Isn't that the worst? I too got little sleep. I've had a few foggy moments during the day, but for such crap sleep I am functioning beautifully. I don't have that "crash" feeling. I came into work and was ready to work. I don't look like hell either and there is always something to be said for that. Derek stayed home with her and I called her pediatrician this morning when her temperature checked in at 102.5. She was in good spirits, but so warm. Went to the docs to confirm/ rule out an ear infection. Not it. Probably Fifths diseases. Tylenol and Ibuprofen is the plan of attack to help her feel better. Lots of cuddles too. Hoping for a good night of rest for all of us. 

Food:

Breakfast: 2 hard-boiled eggs, sweet potato has with turkey

Lunch: Leftover bacon meatloaf topped with pesto, baby carrots with "ranch" for dipping

Dinner: Ground beef (conventional, yuck) with tomato sauce over zoodles

Posting this on Day 12 because we had another rough evening with Lil. Poor thing. Hope she gets better soon.

Day 10

Stayed home with the Little Lady today. She has a low grade fever (101.5). Its Fifths disease or her top teeth coming in. Who knows. Either way we'll be riding it out. I did notice that I had no guilt about staying home with here. Normally if I were the one not feeling well I would have toughed it out and gone to work. There was no question whether or not I would stay home with her. Even though she didn't feel good, I sure did love all the extra cuddles I got today. I love so mush just being in that moment and soaking it in. Nothing like being needed.

After breakfast we went for a walk to Walgreens to get some more baby Tylenol just in case. I noticed that I felt much taller and stronger on our short walk. I haven't really been doing any other form of exercise. Not that I struggled walking before, it just seemed easier. 

I have a confession to make. I broke a rule. I weighed myself. Better than eating non-compliant, but I don't feel bad about it either. I've already forgotten what the scale said, but it was in the 220's and that is good news to me. Today is the first day that I've physically noticed a change. I'm in-between sizes right now which sucks because all my pants are falling down, but the next size down gives me a muffin top, not so cute.

Food:

Breakfast: One and a half hard boiled eggs (Lil had the other half) with sweet potato hash and ground turkey. 

Lunch: Chicken thighs on salad with a vinaigrette. Simple and easy. Served its purpose. 

 

Dinner: Bacon wrapped meatloaf, oven roasted carrots, and green beans. Purdy, ain't she? Delicious too. A little dry because I was so worried about getting some good crispness to the bacon. We devoured the carrots too. None for Lil for tomorrow night. Sorry babe.

Feeling: It was hard being home alone today with Lil. I certainly had moments where I thought about digging a spoon into the carton of ice cream knowing no one would know but me. But it just wasn't worth it. I feel good. Why waste all this effort?

Day 9

I'm struggling to find balance. I have a to do list that is umptine pages long and zero time to do it. Especially now that I spend most of my "free" time in the kitchen cooking. I need to go through Lil's clothes because she is growing like a weed and only has two sets of pj's that currently fit. I know she has at least a couple of sets as hand-me downs, but I haven't had the time to actually go through any of those clothes.

Our anniversary is a week from today and I haven't even begun to think about what to get Derek. I know we aren't doing anything big this year. I asked my Mum if she would take Lil for an overnight so we could catch some uninterrupted Z's. We shall see how that pans out.

Lil is so silly after her bedtime routine . The lights are out and we are just laying on the futon in her room together and she is rolling all over the place gabbing away. Blowing raspberries all over me. I used to get irritated that it would take her so long to settle down before bed sometimes, but tonight I relished in it. Loved every moment and kissed a raspberried her back. She fell asleep cuddled up next to me then rolled around some more till she found her spot. Soaking it in.
 

Food:

Breakfast: Sweet potato has with ground turkey and sage & coconut coffee.

Lunch: Leftover pesto chicken thighs and frozen green beans with Penzey's BBQ3001 spice. Chicken was way better the next day and I am normally not a fan of frozen green beans. But these were delish. Topped them with some ghee and couldn't get much better. Oh, also some olives for more fat.

Dinner: Quick chicken taco salad with a cilantro lime vinaigrette. simple, but good. Should have made a bigger salad. Left feeling unsatisfied.

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Feeling: Good. Digestion is kind of all over the place. I noticed last night that my forehead looks like its breaking out a little. Nothing major. Just a few bumps. But not normal. My rings are spinning like crazy. As time goes by I will probably have to get them re-sized. Other thoughts, prep day sucks. Lil was super clingy yesterday and I would much rather play with her than spend my afternoon in the kitchen.